What is Resentment and How Can Therapy Help?
What is resentment? Resentment is a feeling of anger or bitterness towards someone who has hurt you. It can be difficult to deal with resentment, especially if it builds up over time. If you are struggling with resentment, therapy may be able to help. In this article, we will discuss what resentment is, what causes resentment, the stages of resentment, and how therapy can help those struggling with this emotion.
Understanding what resentment is?
Most people have experienced resentment at some point in their lives. Merriam-Webster defines resentment as “a feeling of ill will or damaged self-esteem that results from a real or imagined wrong or insult.” In other words, resentment is a negative emotion that arises when we feel that we have been wronged in some way. This can be the result of an actual injustice, or it may be a product of our own perceptions and expectations. When we hold onto resentment, it can damage our relationships and hold us back from developing them further. It is critical to understand and recognize the causes of resentment in order to avoid it in our lives.
Main causes of resentment
Resentful feelings usually arise when we believe we have been wronged by someone. We may feel disappointed by that person or that they have taken advantage of, lied to, or treated us unfairly. Resentment can also build up if we feel we are not appreciated for our efforts or if our good deeds go unnoticed. Over time, these small slights can add up and create a sense of simmering anger that is difficult to shake. In some cases, resentment may be directed towards a group of people, or even an entire country. When this happens, it can lead to deep-seated hatred and prejudice. Fortunately, there are ways to deal with resentment before it reaches this point. By acknowledging our hurt feelings and communicating openly with the people involved, we can often resolve the issue and move on.
Common signs of resentment
There are several common signs that resentment is present in our lives. These include:
Feeling angry or bitter towards someone. Anger and bitterness are two common signs that someone may be harboring resentment. On the surface, it may seem like these feelings are justified. However, if we look closer, we will often find that our resentment is actually misplaced. We may be angry with someone for something that is beyond their control, or we may be holding onto bitterness from a past hurt that has long since been forgiven. In these cases, it is important to let go of our resentment and move on.
Dwelling on past hurts or slights. People tend to dwell on past hurts or slights. We think about what we could have done differently or what the other person could have done. We replay it again and again in our minds, fixated on it until it becomes an obsession. This can be harmful to our mental and emotional health. It can prevent us from moving on and living in the present. If we dwell on a hurt long enough, it can turn into anger or resentment. It can cause us to see the other person in a negative light, even if they were not responsible for the hurt. If we dwell on past hurts, we are not living in the present and we are not able to move forward and focus on the future.
Avoiding or withdrawing from a person or group. People tend to avoid or withdraw from people or groups when they are resentful for a few reasons. One reason is that they may fear conflict or retaliation if they stay and try to work through the resentment. Additionally, withdrawing allows them to avoid any further hurt or disappointment by disengaging with the person or group. Finally, withdrawing may be seen as a way to take back some control when someone feels powerless in a situation. In general, people avoid or withdraw from others when they are resentful because it is seen as a way to protect themselves emotionally.
Feeling like you are not being appreciated. When we put time and effort into something and do not receive recognition, it can feel as though our contributions are not valued. This can lead to feelings of frustration, bitterness, and even anger. Often, we may withdraw our support or lash out to get the attention we feel we deserve. If we believe that we are owed gratitude or appreciation, we may be disappointed when it is not forthcoming. Learning to manage our expectations and communicate our needs can help to reduce the feelings of resentment that can arise when we don't feel appreciated.
Why it's important to manage resentment
Resentment is an emotion that can have a serious impact on both our mental and physical health. According to an article written in Hopkins Medicine, "chronic anger puts you into a fight-or-flight mode, which results in numerous changes in heart rate, blood pressure and immune response." When we are in a state of chronic anger, our body is constantly preparing for battle. This puts a toll on our physical health and can lead to problems such as high blood pressure, heart disease, and stroke. Additionally, resentment can take a toll on our mental health. It can cause us to feel isolated, anxious, and depressed. We may have difficulty sleeping, concentrating, or eating. In extreme cases, resentment can lead to self-destructive behaviors such as substance abuse.
It is important to manage our resentment because it can have a serious impact on our health and well-being. If we are able to identify the signs of resentment early on, we can take steps to address the problem or situation before it becomes a bigger problem. Therapy can be an effective way to deal with resentment. A licensed therapist near you can help you to identify the root cause of your resentment and help you work through it in a safe and constructive way. If you are struggling with resentment, please reach out for help.
Finding help. Therapy for resentment
Resentment is something we all have felt at one point or another. It's that nagging feeling of injustice, anger, and betrayal. If you're struggling to let go of resentment, you're not alone. Thankfully, there are a few things you can do to work through these feelings and start to move on. One helpful step is to reach out for support by searching for a therapist near me. Talking about your feelings with someone who can offer guidance and understanding can be instrumental in letting go of resentment. In addition, therapy can help you to identify any patterns of behavior that may be contributing to your resentful feelings. With time, dedication, and effort, it is possible to let go of these negative emotions and start fresh.